It has been said before but never has it been more relevant to me than now. If I look at life – which I have always tended to do – as one epic problem to be solved, one story to be told, one choice to be made, I get very overwhelmed and as a result become aloof and just keep drifting on by. In reality life is made of a million moments, choices, stories – each of which you have complete control over. So when you start to break it down, really down to each moment, each breath, life is a breeze!
Ive recently been introduced to the, in my opinion, life changing and empowering realitiy that everything really is in our control. Life happens for us, not to us. It is your reaction to things and not the things themselves that shape us and our stories.
If you wake up in the morning a bit groggy and tired and you get out of bed and on the way to the toilet you bang your toe on the door, this has the power to determine your mood and your experiences for the rest of the day and beyond. You go straight to blame and victim hood. Fuck this! Why me? And thus as it is written, so it shall be. Your day snowballs from there and you have one of those ‘life’s not fair’ days! Sounds familiar? BUT if you take a mili second to stop and remember that you have the control here you can easily breath, laugh and then watch your day change for the better. This applies to every single interaction you have.
If you meet someone rude who is clearly in a bad mood, you have the control! You do not have to let this infect you. You again have the control.
Control is something most people are striving for. And control is also something most people think is not afforded to them. Especially in the life of a budding actress. I became resigned to the fact that control was something I could never again have. I actively gave my control away to an industry! I put the precious, fragile, beautiful story of my life into the hands of uninterested men. And I did this completely voluntarily. I in turn gave any responsibility for my own life away too. The only part for me to play then was victim. He won’t hire me, she doesn’t like me, I can’t because of them! This is a dangerous place to live.
Luckily I then woke up and realised the ONLY person responsible for my life is ME! Shocker! And a scary but exciting and completely empowering thought.
And it turns out it’s not actually that hard. When you make a choice to live consciously and take your control and your power back you jump straight into the flow of life and great things come easily and frequently. You get out of your own way and allow life’s miracles to bless you!
So here I am, not professing to have it all sussed out but actively trying to take life as beautiful moments and with one breath at a time, make choices to make my life great!
It is not life, but our relationship to life that makes us suffer. – Anne Mullane